Have you been called a wallflower? A shrinking violet? Shy? Maybe you’re someone who likes to lie low at parties, or even refuse invitations altogether. Gatherings of multiple people, certain jobs, or even school, can be incredibly difficult to navigate when you’re someone who suffers from social anxiety. It can feel like you’re trying to navigate a battleground that only you know exists.

While you might feel overwhelmed or even silly for feeling this way in social situations, you’re not alone. Over 15 million people in the U.S alone struggle with some form of social anxiety and that number continues to rise. With so many suffering from social anxiety, there must be some way to manage the symptoms better than you do currently. Let’s talk about that a little bit.

What is Social Anxiety?

You don’t even have to suffer from generalized anxiety or panic disorders to have issues with social anxiety. People who are generally calm normally or don’t suffer from any mental illness can have anxiety when it comes down solely to social situations. You don’t even have to be in a crowded room or around dozens of people to have flare-ups.

Social anxiety can be recognized as tension or anxiety that is caused by the fear of being judged or negatively perceived by other individuals in social situations. That fear of judgment can lead to a lot of different symptoms like tremors, quickened heart rate, digestive upset, and temperature changes. If the fear is bad enough, it can manifest as a panic attack, which is a crippling wave of fear that can cause hyperventilating, dissociation, and racing thoughts.

Especially if you’re unused to anxiety symptoms, it can be incredibly jarring to silently battle with them while you’re in front of other people. Parties, meetings, even just school hallways, can trigger an anxiety reaction that can be difficult to reign in. So what should you do when you’re faced with a situation you can’t get out of and your anxiety flares up?

How to Battle Social Anxiety

There plenty of ways you can handle a flare-up of social anxiety. You can refer to a mental health professional for management, or you can try some methods on your own that can alleviate some of your symptoms. The task of tackling social anxiety and the symptoms related can feel daunting on your own, so it never hurts to ask for help from your doctor, your family, and even trusted friends, when it feels like an uphill battle. Just remember, you aren’t alone in the trenches, and you have resources available to you to make things ultimately feel more bearable.

So what should you have in your arsenal to help cool your anxiety when social situations crop up?

• Have a Plan in Place: This may seem like too simple of a response to something as heavy as your anxiety, but planning can help to avoid some uneasiness or a potential panic attack. Having an excuse in your back pocket to leave if you need to, or having a friend with you/on-call to help get you out if you’re feeling uneasy, can help to alleviate that uncertainty when entering a social situation. Knowing you have a safe and easy escape plan if you’re feeling discomfort can nip some of that anxiety in the bud before it starts.
• Get Comfortable Saying No: While it isn’t advised to isolate yourself, that doesn’t mean you have to agree to every social engagement that comes your way. You know your limits best, and you should feel free to say no if you’re worried your anxiety might get out of hand.
• Ask for Help: We know it can be difficult to admit when your mental health is suffering. Anxiety in social situations can be common, but if it starts getting truly overwhelming you should talk to your doctor. They can give you the resources you need to start managing your feelings, whether that’s referring you to a mental health professional, or offering medical or holistic treatments for symptoms. If you don’t think you can manage to talk to a doctor, then a friend, significant other, or family member, can make all the difference in soothing some of your anxiety.

While it may feel overwhelming, social anxiety isn’t the end of the world. It is more common than you would think to struggle with these issues and you shouldn’t feel ashamed for dealing with them. You’re stronger than you think.

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